by Courtney Camden

What’s so menacing about the things you can’t see?

From dragging your serotonin to the floor and beating it with a bat,

tackling your resolve and slamming your head against the floor,

teeth gone, gushing and bleeding.

Those chemicals;

they’re smarter,

and faster,

and stronger than you.

This is not what you were made for.

This is what you are, regardless.

It’ll kill you if you look away.

It only takes a second.

A trigger, a pill.

They’ll shut out all the lights and crawl under your bed,

scrape away at you from the inside out.

You will need to fight them always. There will be no hills and valleys.

There is only the horrific realization that you will never rest again.

This is your life.

Don’t bother trying to explain it to anyone

Courtney Camden is a D.C. based writer who also works part-time as a Muse at Kate Spade. Her work was most recently published in Flying South (2017) and Chaleur Magazine (May 2018). She is also the recipient of the 2013 Rocky Memorial Scholarship and enjoys volunteering with cats in her spare time.


August 2018

© 2020 by The Esthetic Apostle